The API of Chaos

v2.21.0 — Dismissal, at scale, with an SLA of none.

Base URL - https://api.dumpsterfire.uk

Endpoints

Method	Path	Description
GET	/kick/rocks	Assigns a rock. Optional: ?tier=n, ?min=&max=
GET	/kick/rocks/tiers	The full scale, tier 1 through 14.
GET	/kick/munitions	Assigns an unintentionally-lost munition. Tells you the tier and the arc.
GET	/kick/munitions/tiers	The full scale, tier 1 through 50, in five ten-tier arcs.
GET|POST	/pound/dirt	Adds to your pile.
GET	/pound/dirt/status	Peek at the pile without pounding it.
GET	/pound/dirt/tiers	The full scale, fistful through second moon.
GET	/pound/dirt/leaderboard	Top 20 piles, ranked. IPs shown with the final octet removed.
DELETE	/pound/dirt	Reset the pile. Only from the IP that raised it.
GET	/excuses/teams	A reason not to join the call.
GET	/excuses/social	A reason not to attend, with tier.
GET	/excuses/oops	A reason it went wrong, with tier explanation.
GET	/excuses/ring-ring	A reason you did not pick up.
GET	/excuses/late	A reason you're late.
GET	/excuses/alibis	A reason you weren't there.
GET	/excuses/inlaws	A reason you can't visit the in-laws. Two hundred of them, in ten categories.
GET	/ministry/gentle-correction	Rolls a d6 against the Ministry's approved remedies, graded in newtons.
GET	/ministry/mandatory-pet-adoption	Assigns a legally binding pet from 203 options, tiered by how badly it ends you.
GET	/cage/finger	Put your finger in the cage. 50 animals, 50/50 odds. Costs a finger if taken; once fingers run out, toes are next.
GET	/cage/fictional/finger	Put your finger in the cage. 50 fictional creatures this time. Shares your finger/toe count with /cage/finger.
GET	/cage/finger/haunted	Put your finger in the cage. 100 haunted and supernatural entities this time. Shares your finger/toe count with /cage/finger.
GET	/cage/finger/left	How many fingers and toes you have left, out of 10 each.
GET	/cage/finger/reset	Pray to the gods of the holy hairy toe for 10 fingers and 10 toes again.
GET	/unhinged/8ball	Shake it. It answers, unreliably.
GET	/unhinged/optimism	An unearned, unsupported dose of positivity.
GET	/unhinged/pessimism	An unearned, unsupported dose of dread.
GET	/unhinged/advice	Advice that applies to almost every situation.
GET	/unhinged/non-committal	A refusal to answer, fifty ways
GET	/unhinged/optimistic-dooom	The end of everything, relentlessly reframed as good news. Tiered.
GET	/unhinged/turn-it-upside-down	Flip a random item. Physics declines to attend.
GET	/unhinged/solid-suddenly-liquid	A solid, liquefied. Fifty of them, tiered by regret.
GET	/unhinged/solid-suddenly-gelatinous	A solid, turned to jelly. Fifty of them, tiered by wobble.
GET	/unhinged/choose-your-duck	A bath duck, and what it costs you. Fifty of them, S-Tier to F-Tier.
GET	/unhinged/gravity-resigned	gravity has quit. time to float
GET	/unhinged/vengeful-weather	the sky, personally offended
GET	/unhinged/wrongfall	Clouds went feral. Fifty of them, tiered S to F.
GET	/unhinged/poke	Poke someone, then escalate dramatically. Fifty ways.
GET	/unhinged/storage-buddies	A piece of furniture starts following you. Fifty of them.
GET	/unhinged/fate-arrived	Fate has arrived, badly. A hundred ways.
GET	/unhinged/its-fine	It's fine. Probably. A hundred ways.
GET	/unhinged/suddenly-sideways	Everything has gone sideways. A hundred ways, in seven categories.
GET	/unhinged/adulting-sick-note	A doctor's note for the adult malady of being alive. A hundred, in ten categories.
GET	/unhinged/its-now-fizzy	Everything is now fizzy. A hundred ways, in ten categories.
GET	/unhinged/random-boulder	A boulder is rolling at you. Two hundred of them, in eighteen categories.
GET	/unhinged/toys	A toy, with something wrong with it. A hundred of them, in nine categories.
GET	/unhinged/whats-that	Something is coming over the hill. coming over the hill.
GET	/cursed/childhood-tales	A childhood story, cursed. A hundred of them, in five categories.
GET	/cursed/furniture	A piece of furniture, and what's wrong with it. Two hundred of them.
GET	/cursed/heirloom	A family heirloom, passed down with strings attached. Two hundred of them.
GET	/healthz	Liveness, plus lifetime request, unique-IP, and rocks-kicked counts.

Integrations

Active Integrations

Integration	Version	Published	Status
Web Frontend	2.21.0	✅ yes	Active
Amazon Alexa	2.21.0	✅ yes	Active

MCP Endpoints

Type	Version	URL	Status
OpenAI	2.21.0	Web Frontend/mcp/	Active
Claude	2.21.0	Web Frontend/mcp-claude/	Active

Adding OpenAI MCP

• Type: OpenAPI
• Name: api-of-chaos
• ID (optional): api-of-chaos
• Description: (leave empty)
• URL: https://dumpsterfire.uk/mcp
  • Enabled toggle: on
• Auth: None (no authentication)
• Advanced: (leave collapsed)
• Access Control: (not configured)
• Function Name Filter List: (leave empty — e.g. func1, !func2)

Click Save.

Adding Claude Connector

1. In Claude, go to Settings → Connectors → Add custom connector.
2. Name: anything (api-of-chaos works). URL: https://dumpsterfire.uk/mcp-claude
3. Claude's automatic server check is unreliable against this server regardless of what it actually sends back — it will likely report "Couldn't determine the server settings" and fail to find an authorization server. That's expected. Click Next anyway.
4. On the auth step, choose No authentication — this server has none.
5. Click Add. No further setup: no auth, no session state, nothing to configure.

Notes

• Piles are files on disk and survive restarts, unlike morale.
• Tier 14 is the Moon. There is no tier 15.
• Pounding is rate-limited to once every 2s per pile. Push through it and the dirt guy quits.
• Any /unhinged request has a 1-in-10 chance of falling into the void instead. Just try again.

License

GPL-3.0